February 17, 2010

Parenting - harder on parents or child?

This morning, I have a burning question that stems from a little girl who is new to our daycare and was bawling when I dropped Annika off. It broke my heart to see her and knowing from experience (have changed daycares a couple of times), I am sure she will be fine in a few days. Driving to work, I kept thinking how difficult parenting is. But the more burning part of my question was - who is it more diffcult on - the parent or the child?

I know that this girl's parents might not need to set aside any money for therapy, parenting is difficult on the parent, than it is on the child IMHO. The child is at a age where they are more adaptable and flexible. And their memories are volatile, thank goodness!

Parents (especially moms) are guilt ridden to begin with and we question everything that we do. Sometimes I wonder if its genetic and maybe we inherited the guilt gene and evolution never even went that route! We feel guilty about sending kids to daycare. We feel guilty about keeping them home making them less social. We feel guilty about this, or that. Its never ending.

This parenting is also difficult on parents because we "understand" what is happening and we take it to heart and keep it there for the longest time.

So my burning question today is - parenting is harder on whom - the parents or the child?